I just wanted to give you a glimpse of the laundry situation that we experienced a couple months ago, over the weekend of my 28th birthday.

No, we didn’t remove all the laundry from the baskets and just pile it on top for dramatic effect. There is laundry in the baskets and on top of the baskets.

I’ve christened the pile ‘Shrork’. It’s a name that fits his monstrous persona, don’t you think?

And using this ploy, I have an announcement to make–we are not moving!

We are not passing ‘Go,’ we are not collecting $200.

Yes, I’m aware that I didn’t say that we were thinking about moving. . . but now you know the whole story. That we were thinking of moving–and that we’re not moving. You’re just getting the whole package at once.

You can thank me later for withholding this information since suspense can cause high stress levels, and if there’s one thing I’m not here to do, it’s to add stress to your life.

One day I still hope to have in-building laundry so that I don’t have to lug my dirty undies all over creation. However, though that day has not come yet . . .

. . . it’s still gonna be okay. Right? Shrork?