Our Little Wa-Wa has a name

I’ve been delaying, and for no good reason.

Her name is Alice!

Alice Esther.

“Alice” because I think it’s a beautiful name. In fact, I didn’t even look up the meaning until drafting this post–for the record, it’s a Franco-Germanic name meaning “noble, exalted,” or “noble, of the noble kind.” It comes from Adal (noble) and heid (type).

“Esther” because, as my husband says, she was beautiful inside and out. She was a woman of character, who lived fully in the world and all its mess (no bubble existence for this beauty queen) while also being fully committed to God, his people, and his mission, to the extent that she uttered those famous and thrilling words, “If I die, I die.”

We had pretty much agreed on a name for a girl and a name for a boy before going in for our ultrasound, so once we found out that the Little Wa-Wa is a girl, we just kind of started calling her by name.

We didn’t talk about it first, debate our options, or decide to make the transition–it just happened, in bed one night if I recall correctly.

And then her name started to slip out as I talked about her with others. After this happened a few times, I made myself stop and think. “A lot of people choose to wait until the baby is born to share the name–are you sure you want to just blab it all over the place?” my Cautionary Self questioned.

And my heartfelt answer to myself was–YES!

She is a little girl now. She has an identity now. She has a personality, a favorite spot in my belly, a relationship with God, and hopefully a taste for Thai food (since I’ve been shoveling that stuff down like a madwoman). So why wait until she actually comes into the outer world to call her by name? I want this reminder (to myself as well as others) that she is Alice now, and she will be Alice then too–that she’s the same little girl before birth and after birth.

When my husband says, “What’s Alice up to?” I get a thrill.

When my friends or sisters ask, “How’s little Alice doing?” I get a thrill.

Calling her by name has given my love for her an extra foothold, and I feel it growing every time I talk about her . . . think about her . . . pray for her . . . my daughter, Alice.

23 Weeks

How far along: 23 weeks completed 06.12.2012

Weight gain: My next appointment with the midwives is Monday the 25th. Until then, it’s anyone’s guess. I guess 5. No, 50! No, wait, 5. Well . . . lemme think about it.

Clothes: My long tanks from Target (one of the biggest staples in my wardrobe) are starting to be . . . well, not quite long enough. I think I can make them stretch for a few more weeks, but I will soon need more torso coverage (yes, my torso is ridiculously long). I own three maternity tanks (in black and grey, and one with stripes–I’m wearing the black one in these pictures) and I may have to bust out some cash money to get more. I can’t have my pregnant midriff popping out–thatsa no good-a.

Purchases: Nothing this week. But I’m scheming.

Scheming along the lines of a raid on the Clybourne Ave. Salvation Army, where I will find all their cutest little girl dresses and make off with them into the night!

Body: Depending on what I wear, it can still look like I just ate a big meal instead of the real situation–that I’m actually growing a baby. The other day when I put on a cream-colored blouse to head out to work, my husband said, “Wow, you don’t look pregnant from the front at all.” I gave him an aggressive profile view. “How about now?” I asked. “Well . . .,” he pondered, “I don’t know if you look pregnant as much as . . .’what the heck is going on there?'”

He was right, and I knew it.

So in conclusion, I almost want to wear more belly-emphasizing clothes just so I’m not feeling defensive about looking pudgearrific when I prance about the city.

Sleep: It’s great! I wake up to pee about 3 times per night, but I kind of enjoy being up in the wee hours and getting to tell myself “oooooh . . . look at that! You have 3 more hours of delicious, delectable sleep! That’s enough time for another awesome dream!”

Best moment(s) of the week: Praying for our little girl has been wonderful. When I was in church and I was praying with Eric and Carrie before leading worship, I prayed that my little one would also be praising God while we sang. During the sermon, I prayed that God would be teaching her some of the same things we were learning. And I wonder if he was–because she was moving about like crazy.

Movement: Every few hours! And I love it just as much as ever. Even when she gives me the old jab to the bladder, which she has taken a liking to doing when I’m headed to or home from the grocery store. She’s there–she’s connected to me–and being reminded of that with her acrobatics is so precious.

Food cravings/aversions: Not much to report here. Except that I’ve been eating 3 meals a day–breakfast lunch and dinner–during my pregnancy for possibly the first time in my life (since I was a kid). When I was a teenager I boycotted breakfast (to the chagrin and distress of my parents). When I was in college I boycotted lunch. After college I boycotted many meals, sometimes just doing dinner at night, up until this very year. But when I found out I was having a baby, I knew that had to change immediately. So I did! And you know, it’s not a bad gig, this whole eating more frequently thing.

Symptoms: The occasional leg cramp, which I combat by flexing my foot. Having to pee almost constantly. Feeling more tired than I think I should. Nothing to complain about!

Emotions: Guys, I feel so much better than last week. Still a little up and down, overall more tired than I’d like, but much more at peace.

Hopes and dreams: I am now allowing myself to dream about our new apartment–because we signed a lease! We’re right next to the Devon Market, near the Loyola red line stop. Our lease starts August 15th, and we have a 2 week overlap with our old lease to give us time to move without too much of a crunch. After many years of craptastic kitchens and compromises to save money, I’m so excited about all the nice bits of this new place. Like the kitchen, which is lovely and wonderful . . . the in-unit laundry which we will experience for the first time in our marriage (I’m thinking we can get away with only 2 more trips to the laundromat until then? But maybe that’s wishful thinking . . .). And two bathrooms, with our own private one connected to the master bedroom! It’s seems so–decadent. Luxurious. We are certainly thankful. I know we can live and be happy in any conditions (and we have lived in many), but the blessing of this nicer space right before the Little Wa-Wa arrives just floods my heart with thankfulness to God, who didn’t have to give us all this–but did.

What I miss: Being able to wear all my clothes. I’m starting to feel restricted in my wardrobe selections, and I don’t know if I like where this is headed . . .

What I’m looking forward to: Entering the final trimester of pregnancy, which will happen July 10th. It seems like such a huge landmark–a thrilling one! And starting our Bradley Method classes Monday evening. I’ll tell you all about it during next week’s update!

Husband update:  He’s feeling really excited about our new apartment too, as the place where we will make the big change from couple to family.

Every time I feel our little girl move and my husband is within my reach, I feel compelled to grab his hand and push it onto my belly. “Do you feel that???” I ask. And then he does–and his eyes get wide. I love sharing those moments with him.

I love hearing him dream about the future and say things like “Jenna, this fall we’ll be hanging out in bed, just like this . . . but our little one will be right here with us.” It makes me tear up every time.

Love you guys!! Have a great weekend everyone! And speaking of laundromats, guess where we’ll be Saturday afternoon . . .