So I’ve decided to share my birth story!
And I’m just warning you–it’s not a pretty story detailing how calm I was as I played my hypnotic music mix CD’s and how ethereal I felt as I engaged in this thing that women have been doing for millenniae and how connected I felt to the earth or some such thing.
I mean, I hoped that would be my story, and after taking a 9-session 27-hour Bradley Method natural birthing class, practicing relaxation and hearing about my amazing sister Heidi’s second birth (a water birth) during which no one could tell when she was having a contraction (yes, she was that calm), I was like, “oh yeah. I want to do that!”
I mean, I knew it would be painful, but I felt ready. Ready to have my strength tested and reach beyond the pain into an inner place of peace.
It turned out . . . a little differently.
I still remember my first Sunday back in church, when Alice was 10 days old.
“How did it go?” people asked me.
“Well . . .” I summarized, “basically I yelled “F***! F***! F***!” the whole time.”
Yes, I said the f-word in church. Multiple times, and I think in a loud voice, too.
I also added “Please remind me NEVER TO DO THAT AGAIN.”
Anyway, I recently read this article, which cracked me up and reminded me that I had never shared with you guys about my experience. Plus, Alice will be a year old in a month! So why not go back in time and finally share the nitty gritty with you guys. If you’re a dude, squeamish, or about to give birth for the first time and maybe not wanting to hear about some of the not-so-fun stuff (Veronica, Erica, Kelsey–I’m talking’ about YOU!), feel free to click away.
But for the rest of you: my story is not intended to discourage, frighten or advise. Every woman has a different experience–some are shell-shocked by it, some feel closer than ever to God; some scream, some are quiet, and I even hear that for some it’s a completely pleasurable experience. This is simply my story, and in the effort to finally make peace with it, I’m going to tell it as truthfully as possible.
Love you all and hope to see you back tomorrow!
